our sweet October

October has come and gone in a flash of brilliant gold, and like never before I have reveled in its glory. Days nannying have meant the privilege of making leaf piles, snapping a million gold-hued photos, and gathering bushels worth of apples with the little ones almost everyday. Weekends have seen us traipsing about the city, picking pumpkins at the farmers market, in the fields on the sides of roads gathering the last of summer's late-blooming flora for the vase in my little kitchen. I have baked something sweet every single weekend of October. This  has been one of the loveliest autumns of my memory.

My husband is finishing his season of exterior painting. In January he begins his new full time "tent-making" job as a salesman and estimator for the same painting company, while continuing his Sunday pastoral duties as connections pastor. We are both so excited for the opportunities that we believe will come through his new position, and we are both relieved that the season of manual labor is coming to a close. I have felt more of the burden of domestic responsibility while his job has been so physically demanding. Having him back on a 9-5 type schedule, where he gets to do something in his gifting which gives him energy instead of just draining him is going to be such a relief to our day-to-day functioning. I'm excited to both get home from work around the same time again, and have dinner together every night. To have him take over bedtime for Roger regularly again. It's the little things. They add up and make such a difference in quality of life.

Tomorrow is that handsome man's birthday. Since it falls on a Monday, we will both be working all day. So I've made him his requested birthday apple pie this evening, and it's just finishing in the oven now. It will cool overnight and we will pick up some good vanilla ice cream after work tomorrow and serve it on top of warm slices of pie and celebrate together in our little apartment. Roger will probably run around and do cute things and we will have a low-key night together. 

November is starting so well, I can only expect it to be another wonderful month. But don't misunderstand; I can't tell you October has been perfect (or easy!) but it has been good. There are struggles everyday and I could have every reason to be discontented and want this next month to go more smoothly and have less stress, fewer nights of lost sleep and toddler tantrums, a better-kept apartment that is always clean, and all my desires and prayers answered in easy, direct yeses. . . But I am learning how much better I feel, how much more thankful, how much more I appreciate what God has given me in each moment, when I choose to see the good and trust that God has ordained my days and hours for good purpose. I have made practicing thankfulness a habit and I didn't really notice the difference it has made until this beautiful October. And I'm choosing to carry on in that habit and breathe. And notice. And enjoy what's before me in my simple little life.

Boyhood

I have been doing the mommy thing for almost 15 months now. My son has grown from a tiny 8 pound bundle all curled against my chest to a 23 pound wild boy who runs around our apartment in and out of every room yelling like Tarzan out of sheer boy instinct. He was not long ago just a tiny thing, so dependent, so vulnerable. And now, though still small and still needing me, he can do so much on his own and wants to do so much more. He wants to be big, I can see it in everything he does. He is on a quest to grow up. Already. Which is why I am completely ok with the phase he's in lately: mama-clinging. 

When we come home in the evenings, he attaches himself to me like a barnacle and if Daddy tries to interact with him or hold him or make eye contact, he cries and burrows deeper into my shoulder. He usually warms up to daddy eventually, but if he's tired or hungry, mama is the only one for him.

Roger is an outgoing little dude in general, but I'm so glad he's also the little joey to my kangaroo and wants to be near me all the time. He'll grow out of this, like he's grown out of waking every two hours at night, but I'll be a little sad when he does. It's not convenient to have a little Roger-fanny-pack while I'm trying to cook dinner or do the dishes, but it is a special time in our mother-son relationship and I know it will be over before I know it. So I choose to enjoy it. Soak it up. 

Boyhood is sweet energy. Rough and tender at once. He climbs everything, moves everything, and the fastest speed he can muster is the speed at which he does everything. . . then too often falls and gets hurt and is a puddle in my arms. The good Lord knew boys need mamas.

As a nanny, I get a bigger brood to nestle under my wings than the one little bird I call my own. These late summer days have been spent outside, trying to keep these little people safe while letting them explore and discover without my protective shadow lurking too closely at their heels. The almost-3-year-old is Roger's nearest playtime role model, and he gravitates toward the sandbox when we play outside. I've recently embraced the sandbox as a play area for Roger too, and he already loves it, even though he has no concept yet that sand in mouth/nose/eyes is really not fun. It's pretty adorable though when he tries to wipe sand out of his mouth by rubbing his tongue with his sand-encased fingers. I had to show him he can spit to get the sand out, and needless to say, spitting is a discovery my wild boy was all for. Gotta be sure I censor that new skill to appropriate situations.

The way they learn from their play is one of the things I find most fascinating and wondrous about childhood. They teach themselves about life, drawing from Creation and that deep knowledge of their souls. It's no wonder Jesus spoke so highly of the faith of children. They go on instinct. They humbly soak up what's around them and are always asking questions. Maybe questions we grown ups have forgotten are important; to which we have forgotten we don't know all the answers.

Dig, run, chase bugs, pick apples, find big stones, swing, slide, climb; simple, lovely stuff. Well worth the thorough bath needed after. I'm so glad I get to be mama bird and nanny in their adventurous little world.

Lately

I have started so many blog posts over the past several weeks that were intended to be posted but then never got finished until their content was completely outdated. Maybe I need to stop writing so time-specifically. All my future posts will now read like: "Roger learned to walk. Now he's running and playing little league. His girlfriend is really sweet we hope this one sticks." Haha that's how long it feels between posts sometimes. My few loyal readers will have to agree. 

Speaking of my little guy... Roger turned 1 on May 30 and was celebrated cutely with a Charlie Brown themed birthday party, generously hosted at the home of my nanny fam. Dave made a replica psych booth like Lucy's and photographic cuteness ensued. Was that two months ago already!?

As an official toddler, Roger is now walking quite adeptly and very close to running. He is climbing everything in his reach. Watching Daniel Tiger in the mornings while I get ready for work. Walking around with his blankie wrapped around his head like Linus. Climbing his rummage-sale kiddie slide and laughing proudly as he slides down over and over. Grasping language and following simple directions (when he feels like it.) And hiding his toys in random places: when I asked him where his hotwheels truck was the other day, he walked into the kitchen and retrieved it from inside a box of ziplock bags, as if of course we store hotwheels cars in ziplock bag boxes. I love that it wasn't lost—he knew exactly where he had stowed it. Very unlike his father in that regard.

Speaking of his father... David has transitioned at church from Youth Pastor (full-time), to Connections Pastor (part-time), which is a fantastic fit for his personality. He wore the youth pastor hat well but it never felt like his unique calling, and so this transition (with the amazing support and encouragement of our pastor and church community) has been really smooth. The part-time factor has meant he needed a "tent-making" gig, and so he has been painting houses for a local company for the summer. Prayer for the next opportunity in this non-ministry employment adventure is greatly appreciated. Painting ends in the fall so he's going to need another gig by then. God is a faithful provider; we are not worried about how he will keep feeding and clothing us. Still, prayers can't hurt.

Speaking of clothing... I have been on a fantastic thrift kick lately. Thrifting in a small-ish town is challenging (at least compared to my old stomping grounds of Minneapolis) because there will be waves of new merchandise flowing into the donation bins... and then seemingly unending thrift-droughts where every time you hit the Goodwill you waste an hour scavenging among the same raggedy duds that have been there for months. It's been the former lately—plenty of gold hidden in the racks. I've been able to find all I've needed for summer attire at two local Goodwills... and maybe a clearance Target find here and there. Thrifting in the past month has landed me four pairs of shorts, two of which started as "mom jeans" and I slashed into cut-offs DIY style, and the other two being specific styles (a pair of white chinos and a pair of tribal printed shorts) I had only expected to find at the end of summer in some picked-over clearance rack and two sizes too big. But amazingly there they were in exactly my size and $4 bucks a pop. Never underestimate the bounty of the thrift. I'm very serious.

Speaking of... unrelated segues. My inner Anne Shirley is finding her way to the surface a lot lately— I've been deeply enjoying the flora of my South Dakota summer. Residential landscape flora, mainly, but hey, a flower is a flower. It helps that our next-door neighbor has planted cone flowers and black-eyed susans and lilies and roses all over her yard and on the patch of yard between the sidewalk and the street; like a little garden path, and Roger and I like to walk through it and admire the bobbing bumble bees together. I keep hoping I'll run into the neighbor who lives there, and I finally did this morning. I think she is a kindred spirit. She raises chickens in the backyard and I'm going back this afternoon to purchase some eggs from her. Yep, kindred spirit.

Today is Saturday and that means plenty of chores at home, but also fun. Roger and I have already been to my favorite coffee and bread shops (Coffea and Breadico), the library, the farmers market (the little one that nobody seems to know about but has way better prices), and stopped a few blocks from home to say hi to friends who just moved into our neighborhood. Yay for friends who are within walking distance and have kids my kid can play with! I brought them a loaf of golden raisin and herb bread from Breadico in downtown Sioux Falls-- if they didn't like me before, they like me now. We'll soon be BFFs. Bread friends forever. 

Now Roger is napping from his busy morning out and about and I'm hoping to knock some big To-Dos off my list. Here's hoping your weekend is restful and fun- stop back sometime.